How to Run a Women’s Circle
by Shashi Solluna
One of my biggest passions in teaching has always been women’s groups. When women get together, something magic happens. It almost doesn’t need anything more than just a room and a bunch of women! However, a little structure can hold space for opening up to a deeper level.
As I teach more and more workshops worldwide, I hear a lot of women express that they want to share some of what they experience with others. Of course to teach full workshops with tantric techniques or exercises takes time and empowerment to attain. However, holding a women’s circle is really just one step away from having some girlfriends over for an evening.
In my past four years of leading month-long teacher trainings for women here with Tao Tantric Arts, we have started to put together a simple formula for leading a women’s circle (I like to call it a "Shakti Circle". The first step ideally is to attend some women’s circles with other facilitators to receive that transmission and become inspired. There is no one right way to run a circle, and seeing a few different variations will inspire you and help ignite your own creativity.
As I teach more and more workshops worldwide, I hear a lot of women express that they want to share some of what they experience with others. Of course to teach full workshops with tantric techniques or exercises takes time and empowerment to attain. However, holding a women’s circle is really just one step away from having some girlfriends over for an evening.
In my past four years of leading month-long teacher trainings for women here with Tao Tantric Arts, we have started to put together a simple formula for leading a women’s circle (I like to call it a "Shakti Circle". The first step ideally is to attend some women’s circles with other facilitators to receive that transmission and become inspired. There is no one right way to run a circle, and seeing a few different variations will inspire you and help ignite your own creativity.
Prepare Yourself to Create
Here are a few steps you can follow to design your circle. Before designing you want to first set yourself up and open your inner space for creativity:
Preparing yourself
Preparing yourself
- Set your intention. Your intention is the first seed of the event, and helps the form to manifest. It will also enable you to share your invitation with other women more clearly. It is simplest to make one intention for each circle. If you do not have an idea arising, then you may want to pull an oracle card for inspiration, eg from Osho Zen Tarot or a Goddess Deck. If you do this you can show the card to the women when you introduce the circle.
- Sit and meditate for 10 minutes just watching your breath and dropping into peace. Falling into the void is a good space from which to create.
- After you come out of meditation, notice the overall feeling that starts to arise within you. This can be a sense of the flavour of the circle. Once you have felt that, you can start to fill in the details and design the structure of the circle.
Structure for a Shakti Circle
Here is an idea for a possible class structure, though of course it is just an idea to inspire you. It can be good to start with a set structure and then as you get used to running your own circles you will come up with your own creative ideas. Don't be afraid of structure. A good structure allows for a smooth flow of the energy. Like a good outfit, it should neither be too rigid that it constricts you, nor too lose that it falls off!
- Introduction and Opening. It is good to start with an introduction of yourself and then the theme of the circle. You can show your oracle card if you used one. Or even pass around a deck so every woman pulls her own card for the circle. Also this is the time to state boundaries such as confidentiality.
- Sharing. Next you ask each woman to say her name and her own intention around the theme. If you have more than 5 women it is a good idea to time each sharing so that it is contained and does not go on for too long. Even though this is introductory, the sharings can be quite deep in the safe space of a women’s circle, so beforehand ask the women to hold space for each other by listening with their whole being and not speaking when someone else is sharing. Some people like to use a “talking stick” passing round a stick, rock or crystal so that whoever holds it speaks and all others listen.
- Process. Next you can guide a transformational process, to work with the pain or depth shared and bring a healing opportunity. You can use whatever you are confortable with. It could be a guided meditation or an energy process, a breathing exercise or a visualisation, for example. Something to move energy, uplift and transform.
- Healing and Connection. It can be powerful to ground the experience with touch. Exercises such as one woman lying in the middle and all other caressing her, or laying hands on her can be wonderful. Massage, touch and cuddling are all great. And never underestimate the power of spooning! (The whole group can lie in a Group Spoon, holding each other).
- Closing. You might want to end with a song if you like to sing. If you do not play guitar you can also play a simple chant on your sound system for everyone to join in, such as Snatam Kaur or Deva Premal. Or you might end with humming, or sounding Aum. Others like to end with silent meditation. Make the ending clear so that everyone knows when you have ended the held circle and opened the space up. Words such as “thank you for joining me. Now lets share food and drinks…” can really help the transition from held space back to casual space*.
*Even though casual space is just hanging out, if it is your home you may also want to set a clear time boundary such as “we have until 9.30pm”. If people hang out for hours and hours at your place and you find it hard to end it, you may start to feel resentment. So be clear. No one will dislike you for it, in fact it helps people relax and trust you when you are clear.
A Sample Shakti Circle
To make it easier to imagine, I will offer one simple example of a possible Shakti Circle:
Theme: Loving your body.
Intention: to facilitate women in healing any self-judgments that make them dislike their own body and replace it with feeling natural and alive in their bodies.
Sharing: “Please share your name and then a brief history of your relationship with your own body…the parts that you have found a struggle to love and accept as they are.”
Process: Guided meditation, imagining light above the head and see it pouring down into the body like liquid gold. Start to feel every ell tingling with golden light…from head to toe (each body part is guided to facilitate the process). Smile to each part of the body, and bring breath to it.
Touch: Each woman lies in the middle an the others stroke her gently in the direction of head to toe, saying :this is the body of the goddess”. End with hands resting in stillness somewhere on her body to let her integrate. Help her up with a group hug.
Closing: Sharing the song “I am the light of my soul. I am beautiful. I am bountiful. I am bliss. I am. I am.”
For a video of this song, click here.
You are welcome to start with this one if you like! It is always good for women to dive into body love and healing! Then once you have the feel for it, you can try different themes!
Theme: Loving your body.
Intention: to facilitate women in healing any self-judgments that make them dislike their own body and replace it with feeling natural and alive in their bodies.
Sharing: “Please share your name and then a brief history of your relationship with your own body…the parts that you have found a struggle to love and accept as they are.”
Process: Guided meditation, imagining light above the head and see it pouring down into the body like liquid gold. Start to feel every ell tingling with golden light…from head to toe (each body part is guided to facilitate the process). Smile to each part of the body, and bring breath to it.
Touch: Each woman lies in the middle an the others stroke her gently in the direction of head to toe, saying :this is the body of the goddess”. End with hands resting in stillness somewhere on her body to let her integrate. Help her up with a group hug.
Closing: Sharing the song “I am the light of my soul. I am beautiful. I am bountiful. I am bliss. I am. I am.”
For a video of this song, click here.
You are welcome to start with this one if you like! It is always good for women to dive into body love and healing! Then once you have the feel for it, you can try different themes!
Go for it!
So, it is time to send your invitations! Of course Facebook is a good place to create an event. But also circles may be more intimate, and sometimes it is better to make personalised invitations. Asking for RSVP is helpful for you to set up the right number of cushions or chairs.
Be clear in your invite! State clearly the time, place, theme/intention and any exchange expectation. It can be nice to ask each women to bring some food, fruit or chocolates to share afterwards. Again be clear: "Bring food to share for dinner" or "bring fruit and chocolates to share".
Create your space like a temple! Cushions, candles, soft lighting (but not so soft you cannot make eye contact!). Make sure you have privacy and also that all phones are turned off! Before everyone arrives you can meditate, chant, sing or pray in the space to fill it with good vibrations. And you are ready to go! Just add women...
Train as a facilitator of women's circle, healing sessions, classes and workshops in the one-month Sacred Femininity Training with Shashi Solluna and Minke de Vos.
Be clear in your invite! State clearly the time, place, theme/intention and any exchange expectation. It can be nice to ask each women to bring some food, fruit or chocolates to share afterwards. Again be clear: "Bring food to share for dinner" or "bring fruit and chocolates to share".
Create your space like a temple! Cushions, candles, soft lighting (but not so soft you cannot make eye contact!). Make sure you have privacy and also that all phones are turned off! Before everyone arrives you can meditate, chant, sing or pray in the space to fill it with good vibrations. And you are ready to go! Just add women...
Train as a facilitator of women's circle, healing sessions, classes and workshops in the one-month Sacred Femininity Training with Shashi Solluna and Minke de Vos.